Happiest Friday beautiful creatures. Last night I longed for the moon just because I was in my BLAH mood. I knew my tomorrow, which is right now and tonight would be better and guess what, it really is. The moon was here and beautiful. I wrote a poem for it, making sure it reflects my state of mind right now and I hope you like it and enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.
Poem name: A favour please, moon!
You were my first lullaby while I grew up.
And every mother’s favorite word when they compared us, girls.
You are so far and yet a magic.
Like each girl with those perfect flaws and their set of pearls.
You’re visible to all but belong to none.
Something I relate to and is now our plan,
To be this way while we’re beautiful and young,
Find us a loved one while I sip my martini of some great melon.
For I have been bad in choosing, in this long run.
Prolly one by one, I just have overdone.
So let me know when my time comes,
Or I will simply, hire a gun.
Author of course: Rashmi Duneja
Trying to think what’s this alien feeling called. Am not happy or sad. Feeling nothing yet thoughts are running on my mind. I don’t think I need a diary to write down because it’s not alot that I’m thinking. Just a little, about this moment. Thinking that even a moment has alot of moments within. Do I sound crazy when I say that or do you relate? Bittersweet feeling which is neither happy or sad. Maybe someone should just grab my hand and take me somewhere, anywhere.
This wind almost had me. It’s a beautiful night but no moon.
And these pretty flowers which I feel like plucking every night I come here, I won’t and ever.
This ones for you,
Even if you didn’t ask for it.
And is for me, too.
Coz I’m crazy over it.
Oh, this love is a feeling,
This feeling is lovely.
And I want this forever,
Forever you & me.
Coz this is something special not everyone finds it,
And I just don’t wanna let the go, you & me.
What do you feel?
When I look at you in my special way.
How do you feel?
When I walk, stand and cross your way.
Oh, I want you so bad,
Oh, baby can’t you see?
And my heart is glued on you,
Just like honey & bee.
Coz this is something special not everyone finds it,
And I just don’t wanna let this go, you & me.
Ending with, affection.
Poem name: You & Me.
By Rashmi Duneja (I really couldn’t help me from not mentioning it ;P).
For the last two months, I have only been writing about being overly stressed, being sad and upset and all the negative feelings that I have had also meanwhile writing and trying to make my blogs look like very positive ones. Which might have worked for the readers and for myself as well just to read it, however, on the inside the fact never changed, that I was still stressed and sad. But this month seems to be a pretty good one and a great start for me where am feeling much better from the inside for real. Well yes still at the same time unsure about how to take certain things and make right choices for me ahead.
From this second paragraph, my happy thoughts start. Feeling positive about things and myself and also my new interest in playing guitar, singing and writing songs and poems. I have been practicing it daily and wrote a few songs and it is soothing to me haha, also positive feedbacks about them from my friends and family! Here is one of my songs I recently wrote last month, which obviously as I mentioned was a stressful month and thus the lyrics reflect some of it.
Song name: Yesterday
You never wanna listen,
To all my favorite stories,
That we both had yesterday,
Which still makes my everyday.
Yeah, you told me it is over,
But am just not getting over it,
How perfect it would’ve been,
If this was all just a dream.
And now, I only have hopes and dreams,
To be with you in your arms ooooh, like yesterday.
Is it too much to ask for?
Is it too much for me to dream of?
Is it too much for you to give me what you have yesterday?
Love’s my religion, but he was my faith
Something so sacred, so hard to replace
Fallin’ for him was like fallin’ from grace
All wrapped in one, he was so many sins
Would have done anything, everything for him
And if you ask me, I would do it again.
No need to imagine ’cause I know it’s true
They say “All good boys go to heaven”
But bad boys bring Heaven to you
It’s automatic, it’s just what they do
They say “All good boys go to heaven”
But bad boys bring Heaven to you.
You don’t realize the power they have
Until they leave you and you want them back
Nothing in this world prepares you for that
I’m not ashamed that he wasn’t the one
Had no idea what we would become
There are no regrets, I just thought it was fun.
Hurts to remember the moment we met
The touch that he planted, the garden he left
I guess the rain was just half that effect.
A narration, actually.
You were meant to be together and which is why you met. It was for a short period of time and everything that she got, learned and accepted from you is what’s going to be with her till she dies. Seven years ago she read a book called ”Only Love Is Real” by Dr. Brian Weiss and his lines, ”… A soulmate is someone who is special to us. He or she may come from different generations..may travel across oceans, and continents to reach you..to be with you again.’ They may look different, but your heart knows them”, makes so much sense to her today. ONLY LOVE is a real story about SOULMATES being united. Well, this isn’t a book review but a letter to say how thankful she is to have had you as a lover, a one-sided lover. She believed in him and his book why is why she believes that you met her in this life because you met her in the past life too, must’ve been for a short period too, but it was strong enough and she’s lucky enough to have met you again. And she’s sure, that she will meet you again in her next life, in another form. She wants to thank you for being honest and pure with her for telling her you cannot proceed anymore. You made her see these beautiful moments in such a short period of time, intentionally or unintentionally she’ll never know. Yet, you taught her how to observe people around and how to choose people wisely and be a better version of herself. You always asked her to stay positive and she promises that she will always be. You’ve had amazing crazy times, amazing memories and honestly, the best thing she’s ever had which she obviously will never forget. Every time she thinks about any of your days spent together, she smiles out to her heart’s content with joyful tears and finds it equally beautiful when you were together, as lovers, a lot like lovebirds. A lot like love? She will never know. You supported her and have been there for her always. Never think that she hates you! Hate is a strong word. She does the complete opposite and has chosen to continue doing it till she’s alive. The best thing is that you’re still with her, supporting her and are there for her whenever she needs you. You are the one who’s also helping her feel better and making her accept that to be together, you don’t have to be tied up in some named and officially announced relationship. No matter where you land, who you get in your life, deep in her heart about you, she knows you’ll always be there. Life’s short. She has decided and chosen to stay this way and she feels very happy like that, since she will somehow, still have you. So she says thank you, thank you for each and everything! Be with her like this always for she just needs you always in many other ways. Your story doesn’t end here, it starts here instead. In another form!
She dedicates a song to you called Affection by Cigarettes after Sex.
Ending, just the blog, with Love.
It’s so important to love yourself first. This is what am exactly thinking right now sitting at Starbucks. I got bored thinking that I right now have no one to talk to. I got ready, did little makeup like for a date with myself in this hot summer, got excited about it and bought myself a nice cold coffee. Everyone here has a company on their table. And I’m glad am sitting alone, sipping, observing and thinking.
Ending with some positiveness.
This isn’t really a blog-blog but since it’s somehow still a blog so yeah no problems.
I was just scrolling through my old blog posts including my recent ones, the most recent being like two days back and am so thankful, astounded, surprised and really happy about something, something I saw and has encouraged me more to write down and keep writing more and more for you and me of course.
What did I see? I saw that you all have been sharing my blog posts a lot! Now, this to me seems to be one of the happiest things and I’m really amazed! Looks like I really can write, haha. Well, you made me feel like that not me.
So thank you for sharing my blogs, thank you for reading and understanding them and thank you, for being there like you have! Please keep doing the same, let us continue to share the love and keep inspiring each other!
So, a XoXo to you, you and also you.
Ending this with a bigger than ever, smile!
Or heart’s mind? And where the heck is the gut situated. Well all I know right now is that our heart is the most powerful organ in all ways, ofcourse. And I’ll put the spotlight only on one of my favourite ways, which ofcourse is, love. What a beautiful feeling! You’ll agree if you’ve ever been in love. Or start laughing or continue doing that well.
“You should be with the one who loves you”. Yeah right but what about the other one who’s not in love with you? Would you still be with them? Isn’t it sometimes okay to be with the one whom you love instead? Maybe it’s not always a possibility for both partners to feel the same. Such love I call, a specially challenged love. And this definitely needs a wheelchair. Now another question, who’s supposed to play the role of a wheelchair in the life of love?
“In the beginning there was love, then came hope”. No wonder there are songs on “Hope”, haha.
Well my imaginary story has no begining and therefore no ending.
So simply ending it before it even starts.
I lift my brow,
Show I don’t care.
I don’t smile much,
Present it as my attitude.
I don’t respond to you twice,
I go to places,
Express I have got a life.
But do you know, that I have been wounded?
Know it hurts, to wear a layer of the outside world?
Do you know?
At heart, am craving for you?
Guess you never had to.
Before you leave I’m leaving you.
Too weak, to hold it for long.
After too much of brainstorming, an eyebrow lift and along with it a deep long breath, was now a new relief pitcher.
Not smiling much, is how I was telling myself this is over.
Although I crave to hear from you all the time.
And this I always will.
I went to places we’ve been together once, just to see you.
All I wanted was to feel,
Like a lady would do.
…Ending with a heart explosion.